So recently, while having lunch at the dining table with my husband, just like normal I am chatting away (I never stop talking) and on this particular day, I was talking about my day at work. I am a teacher and apart from writing on my blog – it’s another thing in life that I am really passionate about. I love my classroom. I love the noise, the tell-tales, the stories, the laughs, the co-teachers, the sing-songs… I love being a role model and having innocent little faces look up to me and randomly say, “I love you, Miss Lala.” Needless to say, I work hard for a lot more than my pay cheque…
Anyway, we have a nanny in the classroom with us. The one we had from the beginning of the term moved and I loved her like a sister. I thought of her as a sister and I loved getting to know her and as a team we bonded over the children and enjoyed spending our working day together.
Like all things in life, the nannies changed departments and we have a new nanny. Being the immature/loyal person that I am. I decided I wouldn’t like this nanny as much as the old nanny before I even met her. I decided I would be more firm, share nothing with her and just treat her as a colleague with basic manners I would give to anyone.
One day, she offered to clean my cup and I told her no thank you. (This is not her job and I don’t feel comfortable with others doing ‘extra’ things for me) I feel like it’s the opposite of humble and I can’t afford to be arrogant. To Allah we belong and to Him we will return.
However, she insisted and I let her. I actually didn’t think about it, much. Then she offered to do other things & other things…
As I was telling my husband this information he looked at me in shock and said, “What happened to you?”
My heart almost stopped. He obviously was not joking… so I froze & I didn’t know how to answer this rhetorical question?! He explained that I usually would never let anyone do that and I usually treat people so much better, with dignity and respect.
I started to cry…
At first, I felt like hitting my husband, pointing out his flaws and telling him he’s far from perfect.
Even though I felt really hurt (my favourite person in the world is disappointed in me) I quickly though, How would I feel on the Day of Judgment if Allah is angry with me?
So I decided, he is right. I made a mistake… I followed the crowd for a moment. I let Shaytan’s whispers deceive me for a while so I begged Allah to forgive me.
But I also have to thank my husband. For gently hurting me. As silly as that sounds but that is the people we need in our life. A husband is not only one who is romantic, pours you baths and buys you flowers (although important). A husband is someone who cares about your Akhirah before anything else, who cares about your soul and is not afraid to tell you when you have done something wrong.
Without my husband reminding me, as awful as it was to go through, I might have continued, I might have got worse, God forbid I might have even started treating her like a personal nanny which is usually something that I would despise.
After all, a person’s religion is not entirely what madhab he follows, what knowledge he has or how many books he has read. A person’s religion is in his character and the way he treats people. Treating people, all people, equally with justice and kindness to please Allah, in order not to anger Allah and to have Allah accept our deeds because all of us need Allah’s forgiveness.