Home is not where you live, but where they understand you.


“It’s nice to be nice” – such a common phrase, almost everyone knows it. But it begs the question… is it? Is it nice to be nice? How many times have you made the effort for someone to ignore you, treat you bad or take advantage of your niceness?

Being nice to be nice is not really motivating. What if we don’t want to be nice? What if we feel like being nasty? There’s plenty of nasty people around did they just not feel like being nice today? Some people feel pleasure in seeing others hurt, they feel excited when there’s drama, gossiping and negativity around them – they feel comfortable.

Astaghfrullah… I think it’s much better, logical and fulfilling to be nice for the sake of Allah. To await reward from Him. To receive no thanks from anybody but no that He is the Appreciative (Insert Arabic name) He even made Angels to record every nice thing we do. Who else would make such an effort for you? Some people work with you for months but still don’t make the effort to know your name. Who else would reward you just for smiling? Nobody except Allah.

Furthermore, Google explains “nice” as:

  1. Giving pleasure or satisfaction; pleasant or attractive.


Sometimes it’s nice just to be honest, that’s more kind. But that’s not necessarily attractive? The words nice is not powerful enough to describe the absolute amazing-ness of our Lord yet some people are not satisfied with Islam as their religion. Sometimes, I refuse to shake hands with men… people feel like I’m not nice or pleasant but Allah does.

So sometimes, just sometimes, it’s not nice to be nice. It’s better to have manners, good character and f you are nice, be nice for the sake of Allah.

Good manners are almost two-thirds of religion.

Ibn al-Mubarak, Sifaat as-Safwah (v. 4, p. 145)


Most importantly be a nice person regardless of others. Don’t wait for others to be nice to you. Everyone’s definition of ‘nice’ varies depending on their own vision, therefore someone might feel they are nice, but to you they are not. Therefore, be nice by following the Sunnah there is nothing more nice than that. And remember:

“This world is a bridge and a bridge should not be taken as a home.”


6 thoughts on “Home is not where you live, but where they understand you.

  1. Khawlah says:

    Masha’Allah, I just love the way you think and reflect over these kind of things. I feel like this post lit up a lightbulb in my head alhamdulillah. I am the kind of person who is always ‘nice’ because I’m too shy to be nasty! But sometimes this ‘niceness’ leaves me kicking myself for not standing up for my own principles more. Like when you’ve mentioned about not shaking hands with men – sometimes it’s scary to refuse something out of fear of being rude, but if our being nice was actually for the sake of Allah, then it wouldn’t be so difficult to go against the expectations of people because we’d know that our intentions are purely to please our Maker. Jazakallah khair for reminding me of this 🙂 May Allah place barakah in your beautiful work ❤


  2. ayeshyy says:

    MashaAllah well written and so thought provoking. A simple matter yet so profound. We shouldn’t expect any recognition or appreciation from anybody except Allah. Being nice for his sake and the way He wants should be the definition of ‘nice’ in every Muslim’s dictionary.
    One question, I couldn’t relate the title of this writing to its content? 🤔

    Liked by 1 person

    • Shukrallah says:

      Thank you SO much! You are so right. Unfortunately, I am usually writing in a rush. Lack of time and lack of patience means that sometimes I just write without editing errors or even thinking of an appropriate title LOL Thank you for noticing it really means a lot & it’s something I’ve known I must work on but never do… LOL I’m glad you enjoyed it anyway. Barakallahu Feeki.

      Liked by 1 person

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