I didn’t change. I just found myself.


Even the thought of going to the beach with clothes on instead of my usual choice of swimwear was absolutely absurd to me. It was like considering taking a bath in mud. The concept just didn’t make any sense to me.

What if I get too hot?
What if I suffocate?
What if people judge me?

What if? What if? What if?

To be perfectly honest, in the very beginning of my journey I didn’t think about God. What would He think of me? Astaghfirullah I was too worked up with myself and stressing over other people I completely forgot about Him. Allah subḥānahu wa ta’āla. The whole reason for my existence and deep down the only One I wanted to please.

However, Subhan’Allah as you grow, prosper and change. So does your Imaan, your heart and your mind. You begin to see light where you once saw darkness. You begin to see sunshine where you once saw clouds and you begin to feel liberated for real when really all you felt was an illusion… A life based on desires and human approval is not freedom.

The average British woman spends £140,000 on hair and beauty products throughout her lifetime.

Imagine, women worldwide started to care more about their inner beauty more than their appearance. Imagine a world where women were judged only by Him and only by their deeds. Imagine a world where my beauty is for me and my husband and yours is for you and yours and the two lines are never crossed. Imagine a world where women try to do better instead of look better.

Prophet Muhammad (Sall Allāhu ʿalay-hi wa-sallam) said, “The most beloved to Allah are those who are most beneficial to others.”


Women who do wear hijab/niqab are just the same as you and I. We come from the same Lord. Imagine what some of these women go through on a daily basis, the harassment; the jokes; the stares… not for revealing their bodies in public (that is acceptable in society and even children are encouraged to ‘grow up’ far too fast) but for rejecting this misogynistic society altogether and concealing their bodies.

So, before you are quick to judge a Muslim woman for wearing hijab and assuming she is oppressed or uneducated, remember this famous speech by Nobel Prize winner and Muslim woman, Tawakul Karman, “Man in the early times was almost naked, and as his intellect evolved he started wearing clothes. What I am today and what I’m wearing represents the highest level of thought and civilization that man has achieved, and is not regressive. It’s the removal of clothes that is regressive back to ancient times.”

Do not wear something because others do. Do not like something because others do. Be genuine, in this world full of Kardashian’s be a Khadijah…


4 thoughts on “I didn’t change. I just found myself.

  1. naureen05 says:

    I loved this post! Your candid honesty was refreshing, and so on point. Its always heartwarming to realise the changes we made within ourselves to strive for betterment – and for me, hijab was something I’d never even considered. How things change, Alhumdulillah.

    Liked by 1 person

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